Forget About Toxic Performance Reviews and Find Valuable Feedback.
Performance evaluations at work have major flaws, but your trusted professional network can be a source of useful reviews.
Note: I co-wrote this article with Adriana Colina.
Aaaah, that time of year when office workers around the world dust off the old thesaurus to find words that will convince management “I am a team player” and “my effort resulted in millions of dollars of revenue”: Performance review time.
And. We. All. Hate. It.
You know this already, right? Searching for the phrase “performance reviews are the worst” returns quite a few resources, many of them recent. In discussing a 2018 report on the history of performance management, a BBC article quotes its author saying something that feels very cathartic for some of us:
They’re really toxic and people hate them. You’re creating artificial steps just to check a box.
Knowing the pervasive animosity against such corporate feedback processes, we explored the question: How can we get helpful performance reviews that leave us happy and reassured?
Last year one of us got contacted by a long-time friend and former coworker who needed professional references. We wrote a recommendation including projects, goals, and a description of how our friend contributed to completing them. It occurred to us this was a sort of performance review (mind you, leaving the “opportunities for improvement” out of the public letter and only sharing it privately). Writing it and talking with her felt fabulous. And she said it was great to hear the feedback. What makes a review from a friend that much different from the typical one at work?
Employers have acknowledged that traditional once-a-year reviews are universally despised
Employers have acknowledged that traditional once-a-year reviews are universally despised. They also realized annual evaluations held people accountable for old behavior instead of improving current performance and growing talent. So they started dropping annual reviews beginning at least in the early 2000s and implemented agile approaches like having more frequent and informal conversations. A 2016 Harvard Business Review article explains this evolution of performance management and why it shifted. Companies now try different approaches like the Real-time 360 Review, where they evaluate people by everyone with whom they interact. And yet, we hate them.
Going back to our friend’s “performance review,” it became evident that it was more positive and valuable because none of us felt threatened.
Our experience inside the public and private sectors tells us the relationship between people has more effect than the format, type of questions, or even frequency of reviews. It is intuitive to say that no matter the form, a manager with good communication skills and a good relationship with their employees will conduct better evaluations than a manager who doesn’t care or can’t communicate well.
A manager with good communication skills and a good relationship with their employees will conduct better evaluations than a manager who doesn’t care or can’t communicate well.
For a long time, we have known the effect managers have on employees’ performance. Gallup measured the engagement of 27 million employees and more than 2.5 million work units over two decades and found that direct supervisors account for 70% of the variance in employee engagement.
In addition to communication, we also believe that employees’ accomplishments are directly related to the manager’s performance. In most cases, the direct supervisor conducts reviews. Employees receive information, directives, and feedback from that supervisor. Thus, team results are closely related to the boss’ performance, i.e., what we usually refer to as being set up for success or failure. But in many cases, this factor is not considered when doing reviews.
By the way — other vital factors are typically ignored as well, for example, social environment, resources, political stability, safety, health. Even though they are external to the workplace, they play a critical role in anyone’s development and engagement. It happens in countries with ongoing social and political conflicts where general conditions directly affect people and their job performance.
But let’s go back to the trusting relationship between the reviewer and the reviewed. Did you know that Gallup data also says that 69% of managers and leaders are uncomfortable communicating with employees? But with a friend, we talk easily. There is no threat of losing our job or not getting the bonus. The reviewer has pretty much nothing to lose or gain. We choose our friends; we don’t choose our bosses.
For you, company leadership, this means don’t spend so much time on tools and processes but invest heavily in finding and training good managers (duh). And for employees, your professional network is a hidden treasure for improving your talent: let’s make it a practice to get frequent performance appraisals from trusted people.
Let’s make it a practice to get frequent performance appraisals from trusted people.
If you don’t get any helpful information from work performance reviews, it may be that subjective criteria arose at a particular moment, out of context, or simply from personal opinions. In that case, it is essential to hear from external people that are not part of our day-to-day, don’t have a specific interest, and no power dynamic exists. But even when we have a trusting relationship with our manager, an external point of view will make you better because getting constant feedback, and paying attention to it, is one secret to success.
So let us see how we can create and maintain a structured process for getting performance appraisals from trustworthy people:
What to ask? Even when you are not looking for a job, it can be helpful to accumulate professional recommendations. Ask your colleague to write two letters- a public one “to whom it may concern,” like the typical recommendation, and the second one addressed to you where they provide feedback on what to improve. Or you can follow a more structured, straightforward, and direct approach by asking three questions: What should I stop doing? What should I start doing? And what should I continue doing?
Whatever approach you choose, there are plenty of online and offline resources with examples of questions that will elicit helpful feedback. The general idea is to ask direct questions or give people clear prompts. This article from The Muse has good examples and recommendations.
When? Just like at work, do it as soon as possible and frequently. Perhaps make it part of your regular get-together. If possible, ask for feedback immediately after you interact or your friend watches you behave in a professional setting.
Who? Everybody you trust and have seen you behave in a professional setting:
- The friend that helped you organize a charity event outside of work.
- Colleagues from a different department. You may have worked with them on a one-off initiative.
- Previous managers. Ask them for feedback on specific projects or interactions.
- A recruiter or interviewer that was kind to you. Especially if you got rejected, you’d be surprised at how willing they are to help you.
- Coworkers that you or your manager haven’t asked for feedback.
Knowing who to trust or who is qualified to give feedback can be tricky. A good piece of advice from business consultant Steve Tobak is:
I’ve seen brilliant, accomplished, famous people back some of the most obviously stupid ideas you can imagine. When you consider a source, forget things like title and wealth. Use your own gut instinct. And triangulate. Then, when you’ve got opinions from trusted people, make your decision on your own. After all, you’re the one who’s going to have to live with it.
Motivation and marketing trainer Brendon Burchard provides straight-on advice on building a “strong and empowering peer group” for feedback and support:
You want to find the people in your life who know how to give good feedback, and you want to ask them for more of it.
How? Writing it down with the date in a notepad (old school) or file dedicated to feedback will allow you to review and use it in the future. If writing takes too much time, ask the person if they are comfortable with recording a conversation.
Conclusion
There are often elements in work relationships that do not allow us to have fluid and direct communication. Bad communication can cause wrong interpretations, prejudices, or false expectations that may come up in performance reviews. We hope to have inspired you to actively seek additional feedback from trusted sources or that these ideas help you obtain more effective feedback. This practice helps us see where we are failing and how to improve and reaffirm all those positive aspects that will propel our motivation and feed the self-affirmation of our value as professionals. 💜
If you enjoyed this article, you may also like the one about introvert networking.
